R.M. Drake

You shouldn’t look for answers in people who have left you.
There are no revelations there. No guides. No fulfillment’s of any kind.
You’re not going to find a map to paradise in these people.
You’re going to find confusion and a lot more questions, perhaps even more than you can handle.
And I know people change, that is if they want to but why give in?
Why trust who has broken you before?
I mean, people live and sometimes they have the nerve to come back but that doesn’t mean you’ve got to let them back in.
You don’t have to.
You owe it to yourself to be happy.
Besides look at you now, you’re a goddam superstar and in their absence you have found more of yourself and your smile.
You’re stronger and to be honest, you don’t need to spiral around the bulls*** their universe brings.
You don’t need people who have hurt you to convince you of how beautiful you are.
You’re a flower, and you don’t drown the moment the rain starts falling down.

I Have Fallen Off the Horse Twice

This year had been going well.  I had not drank in months and my workout regimen was on track.  Then about a month ago I went out and drank with a client.  I came home very drunk.  So drunk I felt it the next day.  After that incident I also did not want to workout.  There was no rhyme or reason to it.  I was no longer working out and I started drinking again.  So for the past month I went in reverse and back tracked on all my gains.

What do I do now?  Wallow in self pity or get back on my horse again.  I have gotten back on my horse and stopped drinking and started working out again.  Does it syck that I fell behind on my goals.  Yes, but shit happens.  All I can do is focus on today and restart.